Beyoncé Gets Banned From CMA For Life After Receiving No Nominations For Her Country Album: “She Can Never Be Country

In a stunning and unexpected turn of events, Beyoncé, one of the world’s most beloved and celebrated artists, has been permanently banned from the Country Music Association (CMA) after her latest album, Cowboy Carter, failed to receive a single nomination. The decision, which many are calling both draconian and absurd, was allegedly based on one simple claim from the CMA: “She can never be country.”

Yes, you read that correctly—according to the powers that be in the world of honky-tonk, the genre of steel guitars, boots, and heartbreak just isn’t big enough for Beyoncé. Despite releasing an album that masterfully blended country elements with her signature R&B style, and despite the massive support from her fanbase (and even Dolly Parton!), Beyoncé’s efforts to embrace the genre have been met with a swift and brutal rejection